HAPPY DADDY'S DAY!

I love that way of saying happy father's day.  My niece, Zeia, coined the phrase in the Woodruff family when she was only 1 1/2.  Love it!

My father is a tremendous man.  Without fail, if I tell someone who knows him that I am his daughter, they spend a good number of minutes telling me what a wonderful person and exceptional physician he is.  This happened at least 4 times at the convention alone, and happens at least every other week generally.  I always smile while they compliment him and nod my head, usually finishing the conversation by saying, "I know, I am very lucky and proud to be his daughter."  

My father worked for I think, about 40 years, if not more, as a healer (Uh, I mean an MD in Urology).  He attended the University of Montana in his hometown of Missoula, got his Medical Degree from Stanford, and did his residency at the University of Michigan.  His patients from his private practice are his biggest fans.  He saved many lives, and improved greatly many others.  I still remember being a little girl and him coming home from work broke up from his day.  He was very sad, and when I asked him why he told me there was a young patient of his who because she was sick would not be able to have children and it just made him so sad.  My father cared deeply for his patients and they still stay in touch with him to remind him of their gratitude.  

He has basically flunked retirement and between traveling to Mexico to learn Spanish, writing a book, and staying fit (way more fit than anyone else in the family) he has also found time to devote to seeing patients at the VA Hospitals in new Hampshire and Georgia.  Come Home Dad!  We Miss You!

He is also my biggest fan in terms of my professional pursuits, and was my rock when things went sour at grad school.  He stayed on my side, and supported me through my worst bouts of self-doubt and depression--never once making me feel like I had disappointed him.  

He was my running partner for years, before I decided my body couldn't take it anymore.  He is my favorite person to go biking with, and I love it when we get to work-out at the "Y" together. He makes a mean chili, grills a great piece of fish, and is a true surgeon in the kitchen in general.  Plus, he loves my mother faithfully--has shown me over and over what it means to respect women, and is one of my feminist inspirations.  I could go on and on about my Dad, Dr. Manley Briggs, but I also want to pay tribute to the other Daddy in my life.

Charlie Woodruff is an exceptional young father.  During my pregnancy with River he was so deeply engaged in every aspect of the process.  Always caring and supportive, feeding me food, touch, and love.  We did yoga together (a lot) throughout my pregnancy.  He was unflinching in our decision to have a homebirth and never once increased the doubt that other people would create about the decision.  If I started to waver he would remind me that I was strong and healthy and that we were prepared and had great care.  He made me feel confident in my ability to give birth.  When the birth did come he was amazing.  Held my head above water, played Hall and Metheney over and over for 13 hours, helped me to the bathroom, and cleaned up some pretty gross stuff without complaint! River flew out into his arms and he could not stop crying.  I of course was just happy and laughing but his sweet tears meant so much to me.  One week after the birth (which was Mother's Day in 'o3)  I woke to an apartment full of flowers he had taken River (in the sling) to pick from our local park in the middle of the night. (That is totally Charlie's style--harvest what is available).  When I say full I mean full by the way...it was spectacular)! When I was in grad school he stayed at home for a large part of the time and focused tirelessly on the baby.  I will not go into the details of Canyon's birth, but--I think I hit him pretty hard a few times--and I know I swore at him a lot.  He took it all in stride--another successful homebirth.

Oh, and this is one thing Charlie is really good at--making herb tea combinations after birth that help with afterpains and milk production--I mean he is really good at it.

In terms of raising our boys he is incredible.  Their love of the outdoors is to his credit.  He devotes himself to experiencing nature with them, teaching them to hike and ski--lucky for him both boys seem to have a knack for skiing.  I mean River skis the trees better than me and I am not kidding.  I know he looks forward to many "me and the boys" backcountry adventures with them--and that contribution to their lives is totally priceless.

Charlie is playful beyond measure, will build sandcastles and kick the soccer ball for hours, if I didn't nag him to do other things--and that spirit of fun is another aspect of his fathering that has made our children the playful characters they are.

I know Charlie doubts his fathering skills, I know he struggles to believe he is a great father.  He has reasons for self-doubt that are hard to overcome.  But, I can say here, on father's day that without a doubt he is a fabulous Dad.  HAPPY FATHER'S DAY CHARLIE WOODRUFF!!!!

And so those are the father's in my life I wanted to share words about today.  I know many other great dads whose fathering is emblematic of the other side of the great mothering coin.  Some have children already grown, some are rocking there new baby to sleep right now, and some are guiding teenagers, or teaching young children.  Happy Daddy's Day to all, thanks for what you do, and please enjoy this day.