I'M JUST AN ANIMAL AFTER ALL

That is what it comes down to. I eat and sleep, piss and shit, I've lactated, ovulated, menstruated, procreated and birthed. I am driven by desire for food, sex, space, work. Just an animal. I could move to all fours right now if I wanted. At times, even, I have found myself curled up under sagebrush, coiled together like a suffering coyote. Just an animal. Sometimes I feel like howling, sometimes like tumbling playfully, grooming, nuzzling,feeding, creating. So it is no wonder what happens when we are transcribed into institutions. Health care, school, neighborhoods. Professional contribution, marriage, excel spreadsheets. Seriously. Those things make me not feel like an animal. They make me feel like a mis-matched union. A misunion of instinct and cultural requirement. A mis-conglomeration of gendered interests in the interest of an instinctual drive rooted deeply in my animalness. But I also have such human dreams. Filled with a deepness of emotion and puzzles to be inquisited after. My base level feelings are accentuated by complex emotions. The culture anchors me through these. I am lost in the technique of it all, the technology of it all. i'm just an animal after all