I was surprised by my response. I totally said it, but everyone thought it as way over the top...the truth is that's how I feel. Sick about this. It is a feeling based on powerlessness. What can I do? At one point in this campaign I had the realization that Obama did need focus and energy. So I built an alter, lit candles, put powerful and noble animals and even a race car on it. Not in a religious worship way but in an invoking interconnectedness and support way.
All of this sounds ridiculous, but then I remind myself that I studied the subject of embodied political interconnected consciousness for three years in grad school. I believe that subjects have embodied responses to political systems. Disease of the body is reflected in the dis-ease of the nation (or Patria, which gets at the notion of blood and lineage, which is a central component of our physical understandings as well). In any case the point: I was sick because of the detox that is occurring through an intensive and involved political process...WE ARE ON THE VERGE OF SOMETHING BIG. my instinct to build an alter is all about tapping into a larger politICal conteXt which maybe even touChes at the Mystical notion of democracy.
I DO NOT BELIEVE THAT IF OBAmA IS ELECTED HE WILL SOMEHOW MAGICALLY TRANSFORM THIS NATION. I believe he would lead this nation into a new political plane in which we are inspired to confront the impending challenges this country is facing. I believe we have been waiting for --to use a geological term-- an earthquake in our political landscape. It's shaken up. I am terrified that for some reason, the resolution of the dialectical contradiction will be blocked...o.k., so now I've revealed I'm a Marxist and that explains why I love Obama's historical significance. Marx bases his primary premises on a notion expressed in "Theses on Feuerbach" : people make and are made by materiality. The idea that Obama can fix this nation is farfetched. The idea that he can hep this nation heal itself is not.
The philosophers have only interpreted the world, in various ways; the point is to change it" (Marx, www.marxists.org/archive/marx/works/1845/theses/theses.htm)
But this dis-ease is deep. It has infected our cells it has grown like a cancer--war, violence, exploitation...all symptomatic of a greater imbalance...of course we must act to enact change. Of course no matter what we are in for a trial...but history is made and makes our own choosing.
So I called 13 people in Texas in the last 20 minutes of work tonight...CNN is reporting it too close to call right now. There is a choice and it is fundamental and it will be instrumental.
4 comments:
So I am leaving a comment on my own blog...might as well have a virtual conversation with myself to reflect the perpetual reels of my brain.
CNN proejcts Clinton Wins Texas primary. Did they decide not to mention that Obama won the Caucus? I am going under...may not emerge for days...it is not that I am an ideologue. Cheezy as it sounds this is political intuition as polluted and corrupted as that may be. What happens here is important, yet I feel so lamely prophetic when I view Clinton's Ascendence as something I know as counter...I vacilate so much between going into an illusion of this time as anything other than just a part of the river...do I experience these bumps more painfully than any other generation? I think not...but then I think of the land, the war, the disease and malaise and I am jolted...stress response. Survival mechanism deployed...and my survival mechanism knows its Obama.
My God (esses) did I just use an evolutionary anthropologist explanation to describe why I am support Obama?
Or maybe it won't be blocked...Maybe I won't like the outcome? There is a possibility that i will not like the synthesis. This is why I am will work very hard to go to the National Convention in Denver. I know I can Delegate well for Obama. It may come down to that and I am ready to go!
I didn't want you to be the only one who commented on your blog entry ;)
Interesting that the final caucus counts are not in yet... I keep waiting. Overall... it looks like Obama actually took Texas, and in reality, Florida and Michigan not withstanding I think he may have turned the corner based on addition by subtraction. In other words, Clinton gained virtually no ground and lost a very measurable percentage of her opportunities to do so.
I'll stop stating the obvious now and go back to work :)
I appreciate the positivity. Your optimism helps me sustain the ability to function within ambiguity.
The media did it again this time. It seems very irresponsible to report Cinton's victory without acknowledging the caucus results within the same story...Hey, what about a story regarding the fact that the caucus and primary occurred on the same night...Why? When I made my calls to Texas I didn't know whether to encourage people to caucus or primary...so I just said do both...it is very confusing.
They just wanted her to upset Obama...for some reason wanted this to drag on...and I am very disturbed by the contrast being made between dems and repubs as a result...the repubs are more united? Oh is that why McCain got something like 50% of the vote in Texas? Really, I just cannot bare the idea of media constructions deciding the tone of this contest.
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