STORY OF A SUDDEN CLASH

I got in an argument while tabling today.  Actually, I tabled yesterday, but had a volunteer today, and as soon as I showed up to pack our stuff, I started talking to this gentleman about power sources.  He shared his view that coal should remain the source of fuel in West Virginia, and I concurred.  He talked about the vagaries of nuclear power, and I concurred.  He critiqued hydroelectric, and natural gas.  Again, I enthusiastically concurred.

Then, the conversation turned.  We started talking presidential politics, I don't remember how we bridged there, but he said he was voting for..."McCain"  and I said "What?  Why?"  and he said

"Cuz I'm not gonna vote for a nigger or a chick"

At which point, I moved behind the table and said I couldn't talk to him any longer. (Probably should have kept my cool a bit more.  In college, I had a friend who made posters that said "CONFRONT YOUR RACIST ATTITUDES" and plastered them across campus.  I always think of that, and I know I have racist attitudes, but I try to recognize them, and change them.  I was super surprised by his sudden shift in vernacular.  I really felt like he had done a "violence" to  all of us.  One that could not be tolerated.  I created a boundary, perhaps a bit of an overreaction but it was instantaneous).

He got mad, I think he called me a bitch.  Said I was judging him for his words, and couldn't handle a disagreement.  I explained that I thought his word choice was over the top racist and sexist.  He basically said that was stupid, that words have power and they should be used.  He said the president is the King and that a woman can't be president and that a black man will get killed by someone in Mississippi if he becomes president.  I said it was ridiculous to let fear of someone getting killed stop you from voting for them.  He said he wasn't afraid of that, but that it is what would happen.  Said the democrats should get a real candidate.

I said I disagreed.  That I couldn't get up in the morning if I viewed the world that way.  I asked if he'd seen Obama's speeches.  He laughed and hissed "SPEECHES!" other people write their speeches!  Come on!"

And then there was the gap, the rift, the crevasse...What if he's right?  What if this is a manufactured scam?  What if I don't really matter, if he doesn't really matter?  What if we don't have any 'power'?"

He walked away shaking his head.  

I asked my volunteer what he thought (after requesting he not mention the exchange to my boss).  He said he thought the guy was ignorant, but that a lot of people feel that way about a electing a black man or a woman".  So does that mean its not them who are ignorant, but rather, it's me?"

I got up and danced.  I felt the rhythm and the joy.  So maybe that is where my hope comes from.  Maybe it is naive.  But it keeps me goin'.